Quit Day 5

I quit on Saturday. At about noon, to be sort of exact but still vague. Made it through Saturday pretty well. Sunday not quite as well but still pretty good.

Monday
My Smoking Buddies (Gary and Toni) are out of the office so the social temptation is weak. I'm hyper. I mean, really bouncing off the walls, babbling, wired up.

Tuesday
Gary is back, Toni is still out. I told Gary that I quit so not to invite me to the loading dock. He's been very supportive. I also told a bunch of other folks at work that I'd quit. I figured that instead of not telling anyone (just in case I failed) I'd tell everyone so I had lots of support.

Wednesday
Argh! Definitely the worst day by far. Taking lots of big, deep breaths. I'm coughing. I had a cold when I quit which kinda helped me quit since the smoking wasn't helping the bronchitis. So I have cessation cough and bronchitis cough. Frieda dropped off a little square of Ghirrardeli dark chocolate as a reward for making it through another day. She's great.

Thursday
Not a great day, but still a day. I've made it through another one. Coffee tastes different but I don't have the craving for a cigarette when I have my coffee, which actually surprises me alot. I experimented with green tea earlier in the week and like it. Liked it with honey and a cinnamon stick. Here's my green tea recipe:

4 tea bags
1 4-cup tea pot
4 cups boiling water
2 TBL honey
1/2 cinnamon stick
4 drops of vanilla (or an eighth to a half tsp)

Add the tea bags to the tea pot and add the boiling water. Let steep for five minutes. After steeping, remove the tea bags and add the honey, cinnamon stick, and vanilla; adjust to taste; stir. Pour into favorite cup and sip slowly and leisurely.

The vanilla was an inspired addition which I really like. I've been using a green tea with honey, ginseng, and ecchinacea. Not because I like the ecchinacea but because I like the honey and the ginseng. In fact, I should find some ginseng.

In any case, I played with tea over the weekend and that helped get through. Want a cigarette? Make another pot of decaf green tea.

I'm waking up in the middle of the night, multiple times. Kent quit with me. He's tired all the time. I'm wide awake and ready to run the mile (not that I actually would, of course! gimme a break). But I have indigestion, too, which is a real pain. No pun intended.

Time for bed. At least, time to crawl into bed and read. Rereading Catch-22. It's wonderful, even 20 years after the first time. Better. Always pertinent.

The Simplest Apple Pie. Not.

"...Makes one 8-inch square apple pie, topped with crumbled, rich sweet pastry."

Well, ok, that statement is mostly correct. I would not call this the simplest apple pie. I made this the other day because I'm in search of The Perfect Apple Pie and a perfect crumble topping. This seemed like the best of both worlds. The recipe is from Home Baking, by Jeffrey Alford and Naomi Duguid.*

Crust:
2 Cups all purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar, plus optional extra for apples
12 TBL unsalted butter, cut into small cubes, softened
2 large egg yolks, at room temperature
3 TBL sour cream

Innards:
Scant 1 tsp minced lemon zest (optional)
Up to 2 TBL cold water, if needed
About 3 TBL fine fresh bread crumbs (see page 333)
8 medium-to-large McIntosh apples (nearly four pounds)
2 TBL fresh lemon juice

Ok, it looks simple enough. The crust doesn't have to be rolled but pressed into the pan. The crust is also used for the topping. Ok. The addition of egg yolks and sour cream to the crust was intriguing. I didn't see the advantage of the bread crumbs and, after having made it, I still don't.

Apples are, by nature, time-consuming objects to core, peel, and slice or chop. I would go so far as to say it's a complete pain in the neck except that it's a means to a wonderfully sweet end. These apples, however, are grated. In all my baking experience I'd never had an opportunity to grate apples and I hope I never do again. Use a food processor fitted with a grating blade. If you don't have one then don't make this recipe. Hand grating (they recommend a box grater) is slow and messy. Although I considered it, using a mandolin seemed like too much work. I do love my little wooden-handled apple corer that came to us from Kent's grandmother. For this recipe I'd have liked one of those hand-crank apple peelers. For those of you looking for gifts for the cook who already has a bunch of gadgets, take note :)

Let's discuss the use of Macintosh apples, anyway. Mushy. Grainy. Like Red Delicious but not as sweet. Turns brown in fifteen seconds, not that that's a big deal in this case. I'd definitely use Granny Smith instead.

The theory (from the book): "...Use Macintosh apples so that the grated apples will melt as they cook." The reality: They don't melt. Let's talk about mouth feel. These slightly mushy grated apple strings had a weird mouth feel. Like sweet, sodden cotton yarn. The look reminded me disconcertingly of Playdoh pushed through one of those spaghetti string tools to make Playdoh grass or hair. Here's what I'll do next time. Like I said above, I'll use Granny Smith. But instead of grating it I'll slice it and saute the slices in a little butter, sugar, cinnamon, maybe a dash of cardammom, then dump it into pan. It's a tried and true technique and makes the kitchen smell great. Make extra because it does reduce in mass, plus you want some for nibbling or to go alongside pork chops. I've noticed, too, that when you do a little apple saute before baking that the filling ends up being firmer, less likely to fall apart when you cut into it.

What's with the breadcrumbs? "...Sprinkle the bottom generously with the fresh bread crumbs."

First of all, why fresh? Second, if you have to "see page 333" to make breadcrumbs you've definitely left Simple Food territory. Break up a piece of bread and process it in a food processor, coffee grinder if you have one, or simply used the rest of the can of plain breadcrumbs that you didn't use for that Chicken Parmagiana two months ago. Alternatively, toast a slice of bread and mash the hell out of it. I used a hot dog bun ground in a small coffee grinder.

But, I don't get the point of the breadcrumbs. Why? It doesn't add to the taste. It doesn't keep it from sticking - we've already up greased up the pan. From what I can tell it doesn't do a thing. The crust is pretty substantial and can stand up to the juices pretty well without the breadcrumbs, if that's what they are for.

"...Add water a little at a time if needed to make the dough come together, blending it in, then pull the dough together into a mass."

The crust. I think the crust has real potential but not in its current state and not using those instructions. My version: Add a little water to make it sort-of come together, then cover with plastic wrap and chill while you do the apples. Do not touch with hands. Don't "pull it together" because you'll want to mash it together like a normal pastry crust. Mashing it together has a kind of emulsifiying effect - warming and melting the butter, really getting things mixed together. No, no, no, that really isn't what you want here. This crumble wants to be crumbly. After mashing it and chilling it, well, it comes out just like any other dough. You may as well roll it out. I admit, though, I do like the richness of the egg/sour cream additions.

To this crust-with-potential I'd add some pecans, a handful, chopped but not too finely; barely a 1/2 tsp of salt because whoa was it bland. The "crust" is used for both bottom and top. On the top, sprinkle some sugar and cinnamon very lightly just to add a little top-crispiness.

Assembly. "...Press (1/2 the dough) evenly to cover the bottom; it will be less than 1/4 inch thick." But not much less.

By the way, I'd also make a double batch and use 1/4 to 1/3 on the bottom and the rest on the top. I like lots of crumble. I don't want to see my apples through the crumble. I want at least an inch of crumble. Otherwise what's the point?

Now, a year ago when my mom came to visit we had an apple pie "cake." That was something, a big hit. Never enough crumble. Wish I could find the recipe...

*if you'd like rest of the recipe, including all the instructions, let me know.

Blustery Day

It is blustery and cold and it snowed last night. All very exciting for a temperate marine climate like ours. We've had more snow events this year than in the last ten that I've lived here. Two years ago there was one big snow event. The kids loved it. It hit the day after they returned from Christmas break and kept them out of school the entire rest of the week. I think we had 8" of snow or something. Hampton Roads was paralized. It just wasn't ready for it. They've gotten much better about the whole thing now.

In any event, today is a holiday for me, this was supposed to be a snow-make-up-day but school is closed because of the snow and dangerous roads. The irony is almost too perfect to contemplate. I'm sure the administration is steaming mad. I wouldn't give two cents for it at all if I didn't have 75% of my immediate family dependent on whether the schools were open or not. Two teenagers, and Kent teaches high school.

The alarm went clicked on at 5:30 this morning. Bomp Bomp Bomp, went Blue Man Group, and my first two thoughts were:
1. Gotta change that CD, it's been out wake-up music for six months.
2. Gee, wonder if NPS finally posted a "school closed" notice.

Didn't change the cd. NPS did post. Kent asks: Do you really want to get up now? I answer: sure, why not. I make a pot of coffee. I can get ahead in my homework. It's all Access2002 anyway, it's a no-brainer. If I don't get an A in this class I will realy have been lazy. More than lazy. But it's quiet, I can listen to streaming WRHV, one of the local NPR stations, and do homework.

Problem with a new computer....

...Is all the software you have to RELOAD. And all the software you realize, Oh, Shit, I didn't actually PAY for that...d'oh! Like WinZip. $29. Easy. So off I go with my little blue and silver check card in hand from site to site making sure that I'm a REAL, LEGAL software owner.

Yes, I'm a reformed, recovering leech. Mostly. Ok, pirate. Whatever. I don't have a parrot on my shoulder and you'd be surprised at just how many average middle class Americans have "pirated" their friend's copy of, oh, Adobe Photoshop for instance.

I reformed when I realized that I was getting bitchy about MY creative property but didn't give two snaps for Adobe or Microsofts software. This was about....oh....two years ago. But I'm not perfect. I speed. I tell white lies occasionally if it will get me that extra 10% discount (Why yes, I'm a senior citizen - NOT!)

Let's face it, though, the really dedicated pirates do it because
(a) they can
(b) they can proove that they can
(c) they can't stand Microsoft, Adobe, Macromedia, Sierra, Sony, and whomever else for actually, gasp, charging what the market will bare for a piece of very good programming effort.

Hello? Did it ever occur to anyone that programming is HARD WORK?

Actually, it's a piece of cake. What isn't easy is debugging that slick code you thought you wrote. Been there. It's like a little detective journey which some people (me) like and which others (K) steer clear of at all costs.

To My Valentines

Happy Valentines Day
to my friends,
my family,
my kids,
and,
especially,
Kent.

Wow, Vaio, Wow

I bought a Vaio this week. Wow. This has got to be the best laptop I've ever used. The best computer I've ever used. I'm a walking talking advertisement for Sony Vaio. Go. Run and get one. Now. You won't be sorry. It's a GRX670, which is a recently discontinued model but who cares, it's still faster than the P3 that the boys have completely taken over. Funny, it's a lot like a MAC. Or wait, is that the XP Operating System? Hm.....

Actually, XP is much nicer than it has any right to be, and I'm surprised I like it so much. Microsoft finally got plug-n-play right and mostly handles it in the background.

The sound and video cards on this machine are to die for. Beautiful sound on my headphones which aren't the greatest. SonicStage is a neat little piece of software. Not enough visualizations.

Moving right along. Starbucks recently opened a store located on the route I take to work. Hee hee. 8:30 every morning finds me getting my venti Breakfast Blend with extra room for cream. Nya Nya Nya.

I feel overwhelmed at work and in school right now. Work has me on the merger technology transition team. I'm taking on more responsibility than I'm used to and it's kinda scary. I talked to my boss about it and of course he is more than willing to mentor me along. That's good, too, because I need it. My challenge is that I'm barely keeping up with both the transition activities, my regular stuff (like one-on-ones with my directs, taking care of escalations, managing processes), and the application I support and maintain and program and tweak.

Luv My House

This may sound dorky but I love my house. I really do. I love how the sun slants in through the east windows and makes the gold walls glow. I love the big sturdy columns that demarc the living room from the foyer and the dining room from the living room. I love the coolness of the sage walls in the foyer and how different that is from the red in the dining room. I love the french doors in the dining room and the massive baseboards holding everything solidly in place. I love that I don't have to squeeze between table and wall to get from one room to another. I love having nine feet of dining table at which to work, play, and dine. Last summer it was the test lab for Kent's networking class.

I especially like this time of year when I begin to think of putting up the holiday decorations, the greens and reds of the garlands between the columns, the twinkly lights sparkling above the chestnut floors, listening to Christmas jazz waft through the rooms from the 1970's hifi monstrosity that was left here by the previous owners.

Oh, ya, sure, I like the second and third floors, too, I spent loads of time there. But the first floor is my favorite place to be. I wish the rest of the house looked like it.

I could take this house and drop it anywhere in the world. We didn't move here because of the neighborhood although it's a good neighborhood. We moved here because we fell in love with the house. Two years later we still love the house. It's our haven away from the world, despite the work yet to be done.

The kitchen desparately needs to be remodeled. The carpeting upstairs should be pulled up and all floors, first and second, need to be refinished. Some windows could be replaced. A door needs repainting and another door replaced. The horribly ugly fireplace circa 1950's needs to be ripped out and replaced or closed up. I'd like to finish the basement but that's at the very bottom of my list. Repaint the front porch, this wonderful 32' expanse of Fall and Spring outdoor living. Repoint the front stairs, rebuild the back porch. And a bunch of other little things. Refinish the thirteen columns on the front.

And maybe, just maybe, I should write all this stuff down and prioritize it. Maybe I should go and get that belt sander today and work on the columns. I'll bet I could make a big dent in the work while Kent is working his magic with a pork loin for an afternoon dinner. Maybe I should get serious about the bathroom decor and give it a little oomph instead of leaving it so sterile.

Chewy Chewy Scroll Buttons

We found this great website called Homestarrunner.com. There is this guy called Strong Bad who reminds me of a grungier Space Ghost in attitude. He responds to email in a on-the-edge kind of way we all with we could. Check it out.

In other news...

Cappucine, at almost 14 years old (98 in dog years), is getting slow and beginning to show signs of physical decline. She's had canine old-age stuff going on for a couple of years, but this week its getting more difficult for her to manage the stairs. She won't even contemplate going down the 20 steps from the 2nd level deck to the ground. She just looks at it and says "no way, Jose." She's been leaning against the railing as she gets down stairs indoors, but this morning she lost her footing. Nick says she actually slid down five steps. Poor girl. She got right back up like nothing happened. Her time is coming, I think, and our intention, since she doesn't have any major disease other than arthritis, is to let her go quietly on her on time and terms. I hope it isn't this year. It was really difficult losing Bart to bone cancer last spring.

I have always had such mixed feelings about Cappucine. In my mind she has always been Kent's dog just a little more than she's been "our" dog. I'm not sure why. She's been physically so difficult over the years, what with her flea allergies and thyroid problems. We stopped all her meds about two years ago because neither of us really thought she was getting much benefit from them. She's no worse off now that she was so I still don't think it was necessarily a bad idea. She had a seizure a few months ago that lasted about 2 minutes. It was a really long two minutes, scared the crap out of all of us, and she was really out of it for another couple of hours. She hasn't had another one that we've seen. But, we don't see her from about 830 in the morning until 3 in the afternoon. (Update from 2005: She's still hanging in there!)

We'll all be sad, there's no doubt, but Nick and Kent are going to be the most affected when she passes away. She used to spend every night on Nick's bed when he was younger. He won't let her up now, though, because she farts so badly and regularly. And when her flea dermatitis is at its worst, she just plain stinks. It's really difficult to put any kind of anti-itch spray or steroid lotion on her to reduce the itching because she's so passionately against it.

I'm into my second week of school and damn is it hard! Networking isn't my forte and writing the two papers and the post for the discussion board this last week was the hardest I've worked in a really long time. I will say I've turned into a decent writer (not that THIS is any indication!) and I've learned better how to learn. Sometimes it pays to wait until you're almost 40 to return to school, but I'm not sure I recommend it for everyone.

Over and out, time to get ready for work.